Uvllia “UV” Ibarra
Uvllia “UV” Ibarra
UV is a second year in Fresno State’s MFA program where she focuses on her discipline in fiction writing and more recently indulging in creative nonfiction. She has published in the San Joaquin Review, the first edition in Behemoth Lit Magazine, and Lee Herrick’s OUR CALIFORNIA.
The Bean
I did not know nor feel the significance the fresh pot of pinto beans that my mom made more than a few times a week had on my life until I left home at the age of 18. In my head, everyone made pinto beans. Especially being so close to the Mexican border. It didn’t matter if they were White, Asian, Arabic, Black, Native, or a mermaid; everyone would need a fresh pot of pinto beans. For dinner, for a snack, for a side dish, as a dressing, as a filler, or just to eat for comfort. To no degree did I ever expect that many people, including others who share my Mexican American heritage, not only did not know how to make pinto beans but did not like them. They wouldn’t try them here or there; they wouldn’t try them anywhere. They did not like the smell, the texture, or the taste. They did not like them, Sam-I-am!
I remember growing up, around middle school age, if someone was known to have eaten beans or had beans made in their house, that person was disgusting and may as well eat shit as a close substitute to the bean. Even today, I do not understand the association or why my classmates hated beans so much. I think this was the first step to me rejecting my Mexican roots (on top of hating chiles) and trying to be more Westernized. Yes. I continued to eat beans at home privately, along with the traditional red rice, but all the Mexicans seemed not to agree about the ingredients. Pinto beans were as common as air in my house, and don’t get me started on homemade flour tortillas! My house may have been ghetto, loud, gang-affiliated, abusive, angry, and scary, but never hungry.
Leaving home, I gained as much as 50 pounds in the first year, eating all other foods and trying to replace the nutrition I was missing from the bean. I can say I have a chocolate addiction because of the magnesium I was missing. I ate more French fries and burgers to replace the iron and salt. I ate more pre-packaged cookies for the glucose. Candy could be found in any of my sitting spaces, including my car because I needed tryptophan. My favorite treat when going out was pizza. Meaning my body was low on omega 3. Any snack I had was required to consist of some bread to replace the nitrogen. My body was empty, so I tried to fill it with the world.
The pinto bean’s nutritional value consists of protein, high fiber, complex carbohydrates (which make good natural energy), and vitamins like folate and thiamine. It has four main minerals: iron, magnesium, potassium, and phosphorus. It is also a great source of antioxidants! Babies as young as two months old would be spooned warm and pasty pinto beans to fill their bellies when they can start having solid food. If an infant were sick from low iron or got sick a lot, they would be served the bean broth in their bottle. One to two bottles would cure them right up! Beanie babies are always strong, energetic, and grounded. They are expressive, curious, and a little proud.
As a fellow beaner, in my pantry, I keep stock of the biggest sack of pinto beans, some black beans, northern white beans, red kidney beans, garbanzo beans, coffee beans, fava beans, cannellini beans, red beans, edamame, and I am slowly accepting lima beans.
Author’s Note: Reading Aimee Nezhukumatathil's book “Bite by Bite” and being transported into her world through her explanations of food, relationships, culture, and tradition made me reflect. I wondered what food I would bring to the table that exposed my most vulnerable self and said more about me, my heritage, and my place in the world. I know she had prompts at the end to engage us in writing, but I had an idea before the end of the book. Call it stereotypical, a little racist, or cliché, but as a Mexican American. A Chicana. Latina. Mexicana. A beaner. I feel comfortable enough to explore and explain the significance of the bean. Yes. Clichély, the pinto bean. I have other beans in my pantry. For now, I will reflect on the pinto bean.